Tuesday, April 29, 2008

OW, OW, OW

Pain isn't fun. How's that for a profound statement! My motto is:"If it's not going to be fun, I'm not going to do it". But yet, somehow, pain enters my life and I have to deal with it. From other postings here, you can probably figure out that I believe that every experience in our lives are created by us, alone. Oh, you may catch the flu from your kid or someone where you work; or, maybe you are injured in a car accident that someone else causes. But I say that you brought those experiences into your life. Most likely not intentionally, but you did it nonetheless.

In February just after the big ice/snow storm, I slipped on icy steps. I caught myself and didn't fall, but in the process I pulled a muscle in my thigh and, apparently, rearranged other joints in my hips and lower back. Of course, I caused this. Not by simply slipping - that was the result. The cause was vibrational. It has to be - it always is. I'm still not sure why I did it, but I have some ideas. That's not my point today. The issue is what to do and be once it has happened. Damage control, as unemotional, detached managers like to say.

That is the tough part. No matter what I may be doing during the day, there is the constant "ow, ow, ow" calling me from my lower back. I have trouble sleeping with this so add to the concert: "Ow, tired, ow, ow, I'm sick of this". Regardless of how and why it happened, this is where I am right not. And I knowl that by my thoughts and emotions I bring my future experience into my life. Well, that sucks when I'm in pain. The pain doesn't let me ignore it, so that just brings more of the same for me, right? Yup. Right. This is where the Law of Attraction gets tough and it is a place where everyone gets sometimes - and some people never leave. Sometimes it gets so an individual so identifies with their pain that it becomes their life. I've got a dear friend who is amazingly creative with the illnesses and injuries she has attracted.

So how to proceed... There is always the miraculous recovery that we read about every now and then, but I don't know anything about that. Never worked for me. Oh, I'm certain they occur and there are excellent reasons for them, but I am not in that loop. What I am doing is this: #1, from Eckhart Tolle's book Power of Now, sit down alone and contemplate. I look at myself and admit that my body is injured and it hurts. My intent is to be the individual in pain, but at the same time, be the watcher. Recognize that I do have this, accept it as it is. Accept myself. ABSOLUTELY, with no judgement, no victimhood. On the contrary, with great self love. I can't describe the next step, it just happens. That meditation in itself lessens the pain. I don't know why. I dont' know how. It just does. The pain doesn't go away, but it does lessen and that is what I am looking for. Because lessened pain is the beginning of turning my thoughts and energy around, so that, first, I stop making it worse, and second, I begin healing.

Then, #2, I do my famous picture painting in my head. I see myself golfing with a full complete turn and a powerful release to a magnificent drive. I see myself taking a long bicycle ride, or even the wonderful tired release of having just completed a good strenuous exercise workout. I also tell myself that it doesn't always hurt as much as I think. It is getting better every day. This won't last forever.

There is another part, too. #3, I have active meditations where I see my body on a healing table and I am flooding it with pure white light. I am telling all the cells of my body to clean themselves and spit out all impurities and anything that shouldn't be there. I tell my arteries to clear out plaque (sorta roto-rooter themselves). I tell my bones to disolve the calcium and buildup that has accumulated. I tell all my organs to operate like a swiss watch ( sometimes I even stamp the word "Rolex" on my forehead). And, most certainly, when I am in pain, I focus particularly on the mechanics of healing that situation. Right now it is having all my vertebrae in alignment and the nerves clean and healthy.

When I am not doing any of the above steps and I am going about my normal life, my intent is to give as little attention to the pain as possible. Ignore it. Don't give it the satisfaction of controlling me. Now, that sounds good on paper, but there is some bullshit in that sentence. Lets face it, "ow, ow, ow" it tough to ignore. But at this point I don't have a magic pill to tell you about. What I need to do is exactly the things I mentioned above. I need to be dilligent and focused. I won't do those things perfectly, but everytime I am attempting them, I am not adding to the pain body. And, with time, it does indeed get better. And better. And better.

So, every day in every way, I am getting better and better. And I love the process, just as I love you.

The Old Monk

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